04 August 2010

Those Who Have Been Hurt

So I unfollowed Cunt of the Day on Twitter. The last straw was the inane, what-are-you-for pointlessness of giving the award to Ian Huntley, six years late, but what really made me decide that the occasional insult to neo-cons wasn't worth the massive, tedious reactionary streak was this. Specifically this:
The cuntishness of these two is far greater than that of Vicar Alex Brown who today has been found guilty of conducting hundreds of fake marriages
He did what? The dastard! The utter cunt.

Let's take a step back and look at what this awful, awful cunt did. He... he... Oh GOD I can barely bring myself to say it... he... [sniff]... he married people. To each other! Ah, says the cretin, but in doing so he facilitated illegal immigration.

Well then. Let's take a step back and look at what this awful, awful cunt facilitated. So controlled immigration of people we like is ok, obviously, but this is different, this is illegal immigration. It's a crime. They're basically criminals. Well, technically it's a civil offence. But still. Against the law.

What is it they're actually doing illegally though? Well, firstly, they've not got the right forms and permission slips. Secondly, apart from the ones that outstay their visas or do bogusasylumseekering, they enter the country illegally. And stay. Illegally.

Basically, the grievous offence of illegal immigration pretty much boils down to moving house without the proper paperwork. It's a victimless crime. It's victimlesser than a victimless crime. It's a crime where the only victim is the perpetrator, who is systematically fucked over by the society who despises him for arriving to be fucked over. If you can get your head round what a pathetic excuse for a crime that is, just think how mind-bogglingly harmless aiding and abetting it is. It's the victimless crime of victimless crimes, and Father Alex Brown doesn't deserve to be called a "bit of numptie at times", let alone a cunt.

Which brings me to my favourite bit. In the Guardian.
"We are particularly sorry for those who have been deceived and hurt by the actions of Father Alex Brown"
I can say with some authority that nobody has been hurt by the actions of Father Alex Brown. Anyone who has been hurt by the actions of Father Alex Brown deserves to be hurt. Hurt emotionally, hurt financially and hurt in the face with a big garden strimmer. If anyone who has been hurt by the actions of Father Alex Brown would like to get in contact with me, I will personally introduce them to what real pain is by tapping them gently in the groin with a small feather and rubbing their face with a silk cloth.

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